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Aug. 7th, 2008 | 08:11 pm
location: living room
mood: loved loved
music: forever the sickest kids

Heyy. It's been forever since I've updated this thing. So, I'm sitting here in my living room, watching Disney channel with my dog, and playing on my cousins sidekick. So exciting I know. Haha. So I'm probably wasting my time witting this, because I know no one reads this. Any who. My life is so amazing right now. I couldn't be any happier. I love this amazing douche bag (that's his pet nickname I gave him.) His names John and he loves me lol. He makes me beyond happy and I know I do the same to him. We spend hours on the phone every night and I never get bored. And he just gives me butterflies. If he reads this he's gonna think I'm the biggest dork for witting this. Haha. Also, the other reason why my life's so amazing right is because my best friend/cousin is living with me. Shes been here for two and a half weeks now. So it's pretty bad ass. We're staying up all night watching movies and talking on the phone with john. We sit outside till 3 am smoking and drinking. just having regular girl fun.(= but yes I just thought I'd update everyone on how my life is going. But yeah I'm 100% done with that "joel" kid. Icky,gross,nasty. Lol. But I'm gonna end this here cause I have a mosquito bite above my ass and it needs itching. So peace out.


Apr. 7th, 2008 | 09:46 pm
mood: uncomfortable uncomfortable
music: All Time Low- Coffee Shop Soundtrack

This entry is gonna be about Baylee and how she fucked up my weekend. First off she makes things cool between us. Then I tell her what happened between Cameron and I. Which by the way  Cameron's my sisters boyfriend, and my sisters sick in the hospital in Canada. Baylee messages him and freaks out on him and then she calls up my sick sister and tells her. So by this time my sister is freaking out which is making her even more sick. Now my sister and Cameron wont talk to me.

Cameron only did this all to cheer me up because of what Baylee did to me. I understood that it meant nothing at all to either of us. I never liked him more then my sisters boyfriend and he didn't like me more then my sisters little sister. He hates me now, this sucks because he was amazing. He sent me an IM today and this is what he said...

"Jamie, We cant talk anymore, You cost me so much in my relationship, I cant have that, I love her too much to ever loose her, just for a second.. I'm deleting you off aim, my phone, everything. She is just more important then you to me, I'm sorry..."

That killed me and it ruined my whole day. It'll probably ruin my whole week. I just want my sister to know I'm sorry. I've been calling and texting her and she wont get back to me. I hate that shes mad at me for something that meant nothing.  I also hate Baylee for starting all this crap. Shes taken three amazing people away from me. She doesn't even realize shes doing this... at least I don't think she does.

Cameron if you read this I want you to know I'm sorry and I don't wanna lose you cause your amazing and you help me through out everything, and I thank you for that. Even thought i never said thank you for everything you've done for me and I'm sorry for that. hopefully this will tell you how thankful I am of you and how sorry I fucked everything up. I know you probably wont talk to me anymore but hopefully you can read all this and see how really sorry I am.

I still haven't talked to "Joel" he basically hates my guts. Yet again this is Baylee's fault. I feel as if everyone hates me. which they do. But this is what has been happening to me lately. This is life and it sucks. Not like anyone cares about my shitty life or will read this and find this interesting.

(BTW, Baylee kills cats.)


Apr. 1st, 2008 | 12:09 am
mood: depressed depressed
music: We The Kings- This Is Out Town.

Ok so I decided to make one of theres so I can vent about shit. Reason? No idea, just to bitch and moan about boredom and how fucked in the head I am. mhm. Yeah, so here goes nothing at all.

Today is a shitty day. it's a Monday which everyone hates and its the end of the month so doesn't make it any better. It rained and was cloudy all day. which made it not fun to look out the window. I also couldn't go outside to smoke without my cigarette getting wet. the rain is only nice when it thunders and down pours. thats the best time to be outside. I can remember being younger and playing in the rain. We'd play jump rope, tag, and all those children games. Come to think of it, I'm taking a stand. I'm not gonna get old, I'm gonna be a child for the rest of my life. that was the time in my life that I was the happiest.

Well anyways. what else have i been up to lately? hmm, well, I've been wicked bummed out and depressed. there for two party's that shall not be named. but we'll call them "Joel' and "Emily". so heres the story not like anyone cares but here. so i was "talking" to this Joel kid and one night me and "Emily" went out and hung out. we were in the car and she decided to go though my phone and she found "Joel's" number. so she decided to call him which at the time I didn't think was a bad idea. but now it was the worst thing I've ever done. so i guess they were talking which i didn't mind but now they are all into each other and I'm inviable. Now I don't talk to "Joel" and "Emily" thinks its funny. but whatever i guess thats how things gotta be.

I'm trying to loose weight. so I'm on a water diet. no food, or soda. just good ol' H2O. yummm. i weigh like 125 which makes me look like a fat ass whale. i feel like on of those fat people who cant move that are always on the health channel. I want my goal weight to be at 96- 98. I haven't ate anything in 5 days. which is good. cause my body is getting use to it. and the TV commercials for food doesn't make this any easier. Cameron been telling me to eat and that I'm not fat. But,I am and I love talking to him. He knows what to say to cheer me up. He's always there for me, I can tell him anything and everything and he wont tell a soul. He watches out for me, its like hes the only person in my life I've met who actually cares what i have to say or think. and it's not bad that hes cute on top of all this caring-ness.

well I think this entry is long enough. I've left enough bull shit written down for people to talk shit about. don't ya' think? feel free to comment this bitch and tell me what you think about all this.